Some people feel good about themselves only when helping someone, believe their job or purpose is to help those around them, and sacrifice their own interests and well-being in the effort to aid another.
Why did my friend never do what I told him to do - I gave him an exact detailed solution, and he still did nothing. What is he waiting for?
I want to learn how to be more effective in my communication so people will listen to me and do what I told them to do.
WHY?
What is the reason you want to have these abilities?
Do you want to help others or do you want others to accept you being right, smart and important?
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“Relationships are supposed to be mutually enjoyable and give-take, not charity cases. … You should enter into relationships because you share common values and have a connection. If you are entering a committed relationship with the goal of changing your partner then [they’re a] project, not a partner” David Bennett.
The savior complex harms the fixer as well as their people-projects. Constant helping and sacrificing for others can cause them to feel they are taken for granted when those around them get used to their helpfulness. It can also cause them to experience burnout due to the amount of energy they expend in trying to help others. “Saviors might see symptoms similar to those in people taking care of ailing family members. … They might feel fatigued, drained, depleted in various ways,” Joseph adds.
How does it affect you?
Burnout
Disrupted relationships
Small amount of close friends
A sense of failure
How can you overcome it?
Listen instead of act
Share your opinion after you asked - Do you want to hear my opinion
Don’t give up on people
Don’t be angry with people because they didn’t do what you advised them to do
Give people responsibility and freedom to decide what is right and what is wrong for them and when.